Autumnal Rain

ALL THAT I AM...

When Words Fail You

I Long To Sit in this meadows...

Oh , the lovely Autumn has come and I long to sit in this meadows at the back of my college. To listen to the late summer hum.  To wonder at the bowed heads of wilting grass-blades.  To drink in the gorgeous array of colour of the surrounding trees and the smell of their dew-dripping leaves.  To feel the light breeze and to smell the rain sodden earth.  This I love.  This feels like home.

I would want to paint.  To know the exhilaration of putting paint to paper in hope of coming close to what I see and feel here.  To be reminded that my palette of watercolor just cannot do justice to what's at my feet.  To go home from this place knowing I can look back through the pages of my sketchbook and be here again.

I would want to knit.  To sit here with wools the colors of the field, running through my fingers and needles.  Indeed I would rename the fibers as they fair-isled into a yarn painting:  Autumn Grass, Dew Drop, Goldenrod, and Clover Hay.  And each time I wore the finished piece I'd be able to smell the earth and hear the sounds of my field.

I would want to write.  To craft words that represent each blade of grass, wheat, and wild flower.  Letters that give real-time meaning to the other-worldly air I breathe here. Words that would be carefully crafted as if I had knit them...or painted them.

But I've come to my field without any of these.  Just to sit and take it all in.  I breathe in and out.  I gaze and marvel.  I ruminate.  I try to cease all thought.  And then I close my eyes.  Something trickles down my cheeks.  It is then that I have a thought I've never had before---perhaps all the paintings in watercolor and yarn, all the sketches and drawings, the knitted and crocheted creations, are tear-shaped drops that reflect the beauty that's all around me.  Perhaps a need to create is a way of exhaling it out, a way of crying to the Universe that it is so beautiful and I must make something of it or else I'd simply weep everywhere I go.
_Portia Burton,
Cambridge, October 2, 2013

FAIRIES

THE EFFECTS OF THE ENVIRONMENT UPON HUMAN THINKING AND BEHAVIOUR

THE EFFECTS OF THE ENVIRONMENT UPON HUMAN THINKING AND BEHAVIOUR
   We are now studying about what effects does the environment have on our thinking and behaviour, and conducting some sample studies. . I would rather talk about  the effect of the change in the environment has upon me personally. Just the change in the place of living , from London to Cambridge has already affected me. Away from the mad rush of my metro, I feel more relaxed and at ease with myself in the easy-going life of this small city.The Cam river of this place may be just a baby before the river Thames of London, but it is so clean, pleasant and  friendly! There I have only a pair of trees standing rather in an hopeless resignation on the pavement near my house,but here my neighbourhood is adorned with a great cluster of joyous trees! And I have no words to express the serenity  I experience when I go to my grandmother's tiny village, Grasmere, in Cumbria's 'Lake District'!! And all this goes to show the great role that nature plays in the environment. The more greener the surroundings, the more we are at ease and less strained.Sadly, we seldom take the notice of  the effect  of the change in the seasons upon us, the way nature changes along with the seasons and how we human beings relate  to it. Yes,  the regional environmental and the climatic conditions do affect the thinking and behaviour of the people. All of us are still the children of nature and its changes affect us anywhere in the world....
 The other day I was just glancing out of the window at the funny way the clouds were changing their shapes. I noticed more saturation of grey hue in them and then some leaves fluttered down. It was just like a wake-up call, and I said to myself, oh my, Autumn is here! I was so thrilled by this simple realization! I was just wordless!

Yes,There is something magical about the changing of the seasons that cannot be explained with words, and that’s especially true about autumn! It is a season where you don’t need to check a calendar to know when it starts. You can feel it in your bones and deep inside your brain where mysterious things happen.
When I read some very old 'Celtic' poems, which are mostly about nature, I realize from their simple words which had come out from the sheer awe about the beauty of nature, that we aren’t as closely attuned to nature as those ancient people who took to the woods to collect nuts and roots that could be dried and preserved for the winter months, and sang thankfully for the bounty of autumn. Yet the mysterious urges from nature are still there. Don't we sometimes find ourselves restless with vague longings that affect our work and our social life? Don't we wish to leave this mad rush of city life and go to the woods or at least  to a nearby park for outings and picnics so as to be with each other and also with the nature? Or, don't we sometimes have to be among crowd just to have a feel of 'brotherhood', a  sense of belonging ? Perhaps that may be one of the reasons we squeeze ourselves into a crowded football stadium. I feel It certainly has something to do with primitive urges to flock together. All those 'pagan' festivals were about celebrating togetherness and the wonders of nature.

Technically, autumn begins when the autumnal equinox occurs on or around September 20th. This is when the plane of the equator passes the centre of the Sun, and the earth and Sun are not tilted either way, so the scientists say. The days have become shorter since the first day of summer, but we scarcely notice the first cool mornings and aren’t aware of the birds as they slip away to find a haven further south.  And  we ourselves start getting ready involuntarily for the more cooler days, the misty mornings and even start worrying about winter though it is yet so distant! All this happens because we too, as mammals, are still tied to the 'clock of nature'.

A casual stroll in the morning in our local park,  makes me sense some changes. A week ago there were many geese wandering about hoping for a handout at a picnic table. Then, suddenly, they are gone as if by magic! And even our pets, basically  mammals ,who can't migrate,  do become restless along with the rest of us. I jog through the park early in the morning and glimpse furry creatures peeking from behind trees and from culverts. The rest of the year they seem too busy to notice me. Toward the end of September, they seem indecisive as if something is calling them. I feel it too, and I find myself watching the sky and wondering if I would not be better off somewhere else. I become restless and have an urge to go and sit on the grass in the shade of a tree, as if in answer to a 'call'.
 Now the leaves have started to fall. We enjoy their golden and russet  beauty. But then the winter will come and denude all the trees, who will then wait patiently for the Spring. This is the beauty of nature. It gives us life and absorbs our deaths too. It reminds us that there is an immutable cycle of birth, growth, ripening, decline, decay ,death and rebirth, we share that with the everlasting stars and also with the short-lived gnats. It is this powerful life-affirming effect that nature has upon me. It reassures me silently and helps me in maintaining a kind of inner balance and peace .

-Portia Burton,
Cambridge

MY DOVE